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Saturday, 26 May 2018
1:08 pm

Yes I know, but I have a long week. The pressure I get during work drain out all of my energy, both mentally and physically. Nothing is going according to plan. Sad.

I have no idea what to write. My work life? My love life? hmm, nothing excites me though.As for my work life, I do my very best, perform each task carefully so that I won't cause any delay and yet people still complaining about my work. Funny isn't it? People can't see your good part, they only know how to look at your flaws and use it against you. I know I maybe a new girl on the block who have no experience and knowledge in my field of work but I did try my best to be better. People do make mistake sometime. They will overlook and create something that not suppose to happen. We all are human being after all. We can't escape from mistake. All we can is learn from it and try to minimize it. That's what I do now. Just hope for the best. 

As for my love life, hmm, this can be tricky. I have nothing to say about this. All I can say, love is just pain in the ass. Perfect romance? Perfect love life, all of that are bullshit. Sometimes I just don't know what to do. My love still longing for his past love and I am trying to accept the fact which is suck. I want to be with him and talk about future, all he can say is about the opposite. He have no faith in me and won't fight for me. He keeps on telling me, we can only plan our journey but let God decide. I thought love conquer it all? I thought if we fight this together, we will be together somehow. Okay, enough, I don't wanna talk this anymore. It just hurts me just to think about it.

As for my study, I have been skipping my reading. I don't write my blog anymore. Everything turns upside down. Hmm, I hope I can be strong enough to pull this together. Life never was easy. It gets tougher and tougher.

Saturday, 12 May 2018
9:43 am

Something is bothering me and I can't get it out of my head. Why become an adult is hard? My school days is over. Now start of a new era of my life, start to work as a typist and I type nearly everything. I do my work and I get paid at the end. I should be happy since I can earn myself a living. That is a huge achievement in my life. I know since I was a kid, I always look up to my dad. Growing up is that one thing that I can't wait. Now, look where am I standing now? I have a car, literally it was belong to my dad, so another item checked in my bucket list. But how about commitments and responsibility? Now that I am all grow up but that doesn't mean I am free from those commitments and responsibility that I have now and that is what bothering me for this whole while.

I get stress up. I was upset. Too many ups and downs. Lots of tension from work. At the end, all of my hard works spend on my commitments. Sad, isn't it? I didn't even get the chance to reward myself. Buy myself a new clothes, or treat myself to a spa or maybe get a new hair done. But I can't. I need to save up. Those are just a temptation which you can avoid. What if I spend all of my money, in case of a emergency, what will you do? Ask from your parents? Hmm, that would be tricky. Since I had promise to myself to not to rely on my mom too much. I am a adult now and I should know how to manage myself. That is why I am quite sad, girls in my age, they spend most their money to reward themselves. 

Whenever I feel sad or lost, my boyfriend keeps on reminding me, "What do I want the most?" Me, to study and get a degree. So that's my motivation. That was my reason why I am trying so hard to save up. I come to my sense that I can have those rewards once I get my degree and get a better job. I need to upgrade myself. Just because others can have it, I can't have it too. It just matter of time. They can have it now but I can have it later. Being an adult indeed hard. You are fighting a battle which only you yourself know. You are struggling and yet you show the world you can manage it but in fact, you are hanging on the thread. Life never was easy I must say.

Thursday, 10 May 2018
4:45 pm

I am back for good, I guess? Well, it's been so long that I've been away. I am not sure if there is anyone out there is checking out on me, but I won't butch. I am going to continue to mumbling whatsoever there is in my head right now. 

As you can see, I'm going to do something important, the new beginning in my life. In order to do so, I need to make some new changes, which is try to write my blog at least once per day to "upgrade" my writing skill. (but I'm not sure if it is going to help since no one is going to check my spelling and spot my grammatical mistake) I can hire a tutor but somehow they costs me a lot. I was not born with a silver spoon, so hiring a tutor was a major no. However, my boyfriend keeps on telling me to invest some money for my knowledge and skills. But the thing is, I am a cheapskate. I won't waste money to hire expensive tutor and have no guarantee that I can be better within a month. Can I? hmm nah, I had made up my mind and just stick to the plan.

First thing first, I need to get Band 4 in MUET. Wait, what is MUET? Well, MUET stands for Malaysian University English Test. It was some sort of ticket for your to pursuit your first degree in local university here. I did took MUET back in 2012 if I was not mistaken but the result was not that good. I can't use it anyway. The last choice I have now is to repeat the test all over again.

I am trying so hard to learn English and make English as my second language. Since MUET consist four parts which is Listening, Reading, Speaking and Writing. For Listening, I have my way. Reading, I am forcing myself to read at least five articles or essay per day to improve my vocabulary. Speaking, this one is quite tricky but I will find a way anyway. Last writing, I hope by posting blog every single day will help me to think like a native. Wish me luck!

I know my writing is boring, even my life is boring too. Oh well, maybe I just plain boring. Not sure if it's make sense. I am an introvert for your information. Social life, hanging out with friends, or any other leisure activities that might involves with crowd is big no for me. I rather stay at home, watch TV, scroll my phone back to forth from Facebook to Whatsapp and Whatsapp to Instagram and repeat. That's me and welcome to my life. I don't know how to start a conversation with anyone since I have only one friend and one boyfriend. Most of the time, I spend my time with my family, my boyfriend and my colleague (the only friend I have). Pathetic isn't it? but I'm happy. Screw those who thinks my life was boring. As long as I'm happy, that is all the matter. Right? 

That's all from me. I think migraine has strikes me this time and I need to take some rest too. See you tomorrow!

Monday, 4 September 2017
10:12 am

Who ever thought that you would find someone who can really bring color to your life?
Someone who see beauty in you
When he looks into your eyes, he sees the world
Does that person even exist?

I have been search high and low
Meeting new people over and over again
Instant happiness turn to sorrow
Barely alive yet is not enough

Give up will always be the answer
Doesn't believe in fairly tale
Set your mind and keep telling yourself that no such thing is happy ending
But right at that moment, you found something

Yes something that I am not familiar with
Something can make my sadness go away
Something can bring joy to my life
And somethings that I wish to hold till death apart

Days after days, nothing to seem gone wrong
Everything just to be so perfect
Your heart keep telling me that he is the one
and yet your mind says "this is going to be a rough path"

That sparks in your life is enlighthing
It feels like nothing is holding you back as long as you have him
The charm that you thought you would never found
But it was there from the beginning

But the question is
Can I keep him?
Can he be mine forever?
Can I just stop the time and let me be with him?
Can I be "friend" with someone that you love the most?
Can I keep this happiness forever and never let go?

Saturday, 7 May 2016
8:55 pm

I have always wanted to have a tattoo, ever since I was in high school. Don't you just love art? Well, I do! I adore tattoo so much so I decided to make one!

I don't know why I choose snowflakes as my tattoo design. But it caught my attention so here, I have three blue snowflakes as my tattoo at the back of my neck. 

Having such masterpiece is not that easy. You need to endure pain in order to get your tattoo done. Well, I was nervous as hell and it does hurt but I try to endure as much as I can and waaa-lahh! It was worth the pain! Beauty is pain indeed. 

Angelene Bong
Born and raised in a city called Kuching. (Land of Borneo) I have mixed blood in me, my dad is pure Chinese and my mom is pure Bidayuh. 163cm tall with the weight of 73.3kg.


"You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one"